I've seen lately a wave—especially in my clients—of people who get diagnosed as neurodivergent.

So, people who have autism, or Asperger's, or ADHD—they start to cling to that label, like “I'm autistic, and I'm just gonna stay that forever.”Or people with depression: “I'm depressed,” as in, that's my identity. Or, “I'm an anxious person; I have social anxiety.”

Now, these labels—these identities—do seem to play a helpful role, temporarily.

Everyone I've ever worked with who didn't realize they were on the autistic spectrum has found it very helpful to find that out.

When I pointed it out to them, they’re like, “Oh, okay—I’m not just a freak. There’s a name for this thing.”

I think there's some relief and a reduction of shame in the label.

I see that with Nice Guy Syndrome as well.

When guys have struggled their whole life and they feel like they're doing everything right—but it doesn't make them happy, it doesn't make sense—and someone goes, “Yeah, you’ve got the syndrome, man,” it finally clicks.

It backfires on you, like: You're not as nice as you think you are. You're being fake. That’s why you get these results. And they go, “Oh god—it finally makes sense.”

I think that relief comes from, Well, if this thing has a label, and people have studied it, maybe there's a solution.

The problem, of course, is that you can become almost addicted to having the label—sometimes even defiantly proud of it.

To dive deeper into this topic, check out the original video here:

https://youtu.be/267Zk4nt1oM

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