Shame is one of the most powerful and painful limiting beliefs that humans imprison themselves with psychologically. Fortunately, like any limiting belief, it can be conquered.
The Shame Grid is a tool which allows you to address and conquer shame in your life.
Make a list of all of the aspects of yourself, which you feel shame about. You don't need to know whether they are accurate, only whether some part of your mind believes them. For example;
Make a list of these down the left-side of a sheet of paper.
Across the top of the paper, write the different groups of people around which you become aware of your shame. Often, you will feel stronger/weaker negativity around each "shame" you have listed, depending on who you are around. For example;
You now have a grid, with rows and columns. Draw those rows and columns in, like a spreadsheet.
At each point of intersection, between a "Shame item" and a "Context", measure the strength of Shame you feel, on a scale of 1 - 5...
Review your Shame Grid, you'll discover new "shames" as you write the grid, and you'll notice that some Context groups need to be separated, e.g. you may experience different levels of shame between Mom & Dad, so
Shame is one of the greatest barriers to Self-Confidence. This is simply because if you do not believe you are 100% a good person, then there is no way you can believe that others will see you as 100% a good person.
Ultimately, your goal is to "clear" the Shame Grid, by revealing your shame - this may take years.
Begin with the lowest level, 1, and begin revealing your shame to those groups. Once all the 1's are cleared, you can move on to the 2's, and so on.
As you do this, you will quickly see your sense of self-acceptance, and self-confidence rise.
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