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I opened up to friends about my lack of experience, and also tried being more sexually flirtacious - both were very nerve wracking experiences.
Sexual shame was embedded in so much of my behaviour - I never had reflected on that before, so I wasn't aware of it, therefore unable to change it until now. Having the realisation how big my sexual shame is, how much of my life it takes up, has given me the freedom to overcome it, or at least many aspects of it.
I talked to people about the things that caused me shame. I practiced being more honest with people in general. My filter for seeing the truth in any given moment and ignoring or at least identifying stories has improved. Favorite part was realizing that some of the stories around sexuality are not true.
My main insights about sexuality now are that I have repressed it for three main reasons: 1) to protect myself from letting girls and women down 2) to protect myself from envy of less able and attractive men. 3) and to protect myself from envy, hostility and possible confrontation with regard to "alpha" types who want to put me and keep me in a particular box and neutralise any threat. I have learned through this course that it is ok to behave in line with your actual values around sex and destructive to bury them so deeply that it causes severe mental distress over time..
Overcoming Sexual Shame is about letting go of unhelpful and painful beliefs you've been taught about sex and sexuality. Shame is when you attach the concept of 'wrong' to something true about you, so sexual shame is thinking something to do with sex or sexuality is wrong, even when it's true and totally normal.
In this course, we will be looking to unpack the current views you have around sex, attraction, physical bonding, masculinity and femininity, to find out where you may be held back and ashamed.
We will cover:
* Where your shame came from
* How it affects your social life and self-worth
* How to express yourself sexually without shame
* How to express attraction, interest and desire without causing problems
* How to bring flirting, touch and sensuality into your interactions
By the end of this course you'll have a blueprint made of mindset and behaviour patterns that you can use to slowly reduce your sexual shame over time. Change in this area doesn't happen overnight, but with consistent psychological challenging and experimental social practices, you can learn to become sexually shameless and free to express yourself without guilt.
(P.S. If you have not done the pre-requisite courses but you have completed a Shame Grid exercise with either a BROJO Coach or during a BROJO workshop, you can qualify for entry to this course)
The following courses need to be completed prior to taking this course.